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FITS False Alarm!

Mrs. FITS was doing some Christmas shopping in Chapel Hill early today
when she heard a rumor that Dick "Willy Loman" Baddour was driving a brand
new Beamer, but alas, when she zipped on over to the Dead Dome, all she
could find was Supersalesman Dick kicking the door of a rusted out Yugo
while he screeched "We are UNC!"